to do in june

1. paint living room olive green (one wall)
   
2. paint dining room yellow (two walls)
   
3. paint kitchen pink (one wall)
4. paint bedroom magenta (one wall, the other walls primed white)
5. paint my "other" apartment
6. buy a new cell phone
7. catch up on all my TV shows I never watched: Sopranos, DeGrassi High, Reno 911 after season one, Arrested Development season two and three, Queer as Folk season five, Six Feet Under, Deadwood, Family Guy, etc.
8. watch "classic" and "great" movies I have also never seen, such as Last of the Mohicans, Braveheart, My Left Foot, Unforgiven, The Color Purple...
   
9. fake tanner
10. eat lots of popsicles
    
11. go to the Hollywood Bowl every other day
12. spend time with my most favorite NPR fan (that's you, baby!)
    
13. take walks
14. balance my checkbook (from January)
15. PLAN AN ENTIRE YEAR'S WORTH OF CURRICULUM (so exciting, seriously, like a wet dream)
16. read the stack of books that has been waiting patiently for me since last June
    

looky-likeys

Thanks, Mindy!! I'm writing straight off my high as being recognized "facially similiar" to Christy Turlington. I'm just going to ignore my second trial which pegged me looking like Danny Kaye.



Try it!

four questions

ME: Did you do the four questions last night?
Four Year Old Arielle: Yeah.
ME: Me too.
FYOA: Really?!!? (Eyes widen in surprise.)
ME: Yeah.
FYOA: (giggles)

ME: Did you stand on your chair?
FYOA: No... did you?!!
ME: Yeah.
FYOA: (Gasps, eyes widen considerably, giggling now out of contol.)

dream sex

Hipster girl #1: ...So now I feel really uncomfortable whenever I'm around him.

Hipster girl #2: Why? 'Cause you had dream sex with him?

THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENS TO ME ALL THE TIME!!!!!!!

Not all the time with dream sex, I actually haven't had dream sex since I started having real sex on a regular basis, but I've had really personal encounters and conversations with friends and enemies in my sleep and then when I wake up it's either a relief because it was just a dream or an embarrassing shame because WHY WAS I MAKING OUT WITH HIM (or her) LAST NIGHT?!?!???

I remember back in tenth grade, before I'd done anything even remotely close to sex, I had a dream about a guy I had a semi-crush on, and in my dream we were about to have sex but after two seconds someone walked into the dream bedroom and we had to stop. I remember feeling a bit let down that I wasn't going to experience (fake) sex (in my dream), but more vivid was my mortification when I saw him the next day in class. Because it was obvious to me that IT SHOWED.

slutty moms

This is exactly the kind of conversations that I have with my mom, the ones that afterwards I have to recount to every single one of my friends because I'm still in shock, like the time she told me she slept with her best friend's boyfriend while they were on a break and oops! gave him mono:

It’s 93 degrees in Michigan. My sister and I decide to spend the day at the pool; hoping to get rid of tan lines and look our best in our strapless bridesmaid dresses. Since I failed to pack a swimsuit, I raid my mom’s closet and come across one of her fun, skanky bikinis from the seventies. I run down to the kitchen to model my nostalgic find. My mom is making some gigantic twenty-layer taco dip and looks up at me and smiles.
“Oh, I used to love that bikini.”
She grabs a knife and starts dicing baby tomatoes.
“I lost my virginity in that bathing suit.”
She continues dicing tomatoes.

From Mindy Raf, my new favorite person.

social psych?

While attending my debt management session, I found a piece of paper on the floor printed with this:

(1) Sara, please pass this to WILL HOLZER, who is directly behind you, two rows back (behind Karen).

(2) Will, please pass this across the aisle to KRISTEN GERWECK. She is one row in front of you, on the end of the middle section, just across from Nancy.

(3) KRISTEN, please pass this to TIM JACKSON. Tim is in the row behind you, two seats over, next to Janice.

(4) TIM, please pass this to JEREMY JONES. Jeremy usually sits directly behind you, two rows up.

(5) JEREMY, please bring it to me after class.

Many thanks!

hott

Today I went shopping with THE BOY at Urban Outfitters, an extremely overpriced but awesome clothing store. I browsed the girly things while he tried on jeans. When I got bored, I went into the dressing room, calling his name as I walked down the aisle. The salesgirl asked me if I was looking for someone, and I said yes. She asked what he looked like, and what almost seriously came out of my mouth was, "he's hot."