I no speaking espanish

Inspired by Nathan's experiences in Peru, today, in my head, I figured out what I would do if my Visa card got stuck in the ATM. Since I only know six words in Spanish, my imaginary encounter with the Peruvian banker was quite a feat. It went like this:
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me: Pardon? No hablo Espanol. Uno mimento?

banker: Looks up at the dumb American girl

me: Me gusta dinero. Dinero automati -- (here I ouline the square shape of the ATM screen). Yo -- (mime walking up to it, sticking my card in, pressing numbers.)

banker: Blank, indescernable gaze

me: Yo quiera mucho dinero. Sol. [That's the name of the Peruvian money.] (mime pressing buttons. Stand there, as if waiting for my money. Tilt head ever so slightly, as if still waiting for my money but slightly confused as to where it is.) Donde dinero? Donde? No dinero! Yo -- (point to self, then mime looking at my watch and tapping it, then glaring at ATM screen) Donde dinero??? No dinero!
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I hope you realize that only half of the "Spanish" words I used are real. In order to get the real gist of my daydream, you have to imagine me using big, swooping, exaggerated hand movements. Wide enough that Wade, standing to my left (again, IN MY HEAD), has to take a few steps back to avoid being hit. Thanks, American Sign Language, for teaching me to visually set up a scene using just my hands and body.

I realize now I am the biggest dork, not because I don't know Spanish, but because I had this entire conversation IN MY MIND.