my other life

Sorry I'm being a disgusting mushy retard. Here are some other things I'm doing in my life besides grossing you out:

• Watching "The Bachelor." This grosses me out, too, but I can't help myself. I heart Melissa.

• Knitting. Right now I'm making a pea green, chunky, ribbed scarf. It's addictive. There has been a knitting elective for a few months and all the kids at school are really into it and they tote their little bags of yarn and needles around all day. It's awesome, especially for some of the anger management psycho girls who now enter the classroom, sit down, and start to knit. Instead of starting shit with other kids. So anyways, I got jealous and started my own project. It looks kind of like this, but way less barfy.

• I am obsessed with pomelos. Thank God tomorrow is Farmers Market day and I can buy some more.
  

• Still running, although less frequently. (First there was the rain, then the flu, then my period.) Today I ran for 0.7 miles straight without stopping. YAY! Now that I have super awesome sports bras and cool running shorts with mini pockets and (ugly, trendy,) leggings, I WANT to run. Oh, and, of course, my ipod. I have found some super duper podcasts that make me want to stay out for way longer than my normal workout. NPR "This American Life" and "Radio Lab" are my current faves.
  

• I may have a thyroid problem or a prolapsed heart valve. I've been having palpitations for two weeks and they are driving me batty. The good news is that I had a normal EKG.
  

when it rains, it pours

Remember Wade? The one I went to Peru with and then didn't talk to afterwards? It's been three years since we've spoken last. I got an email from him this weekend apologizing for being a dick and offering an explanation. We're meeting on Sunday. I'm seriously anxious and also kind of excited.

The Boy says the only reason a guy would contact me like that after so much time is to test the waters with the vague hope of a potential hook-up/relationship down the line. I think there is some truth to that. I can't decide if that makes me feel good, or bad, or both.

Remember this shithead? It's been three months of commitment and I have to say that I'm a little surprised it's lasted this long. We've been spending more time together and I've learned new things about him that I love. Although he sucks to an absurd degree at discussing his emotions, he's done some pretty awesome things, and when I describe them to my friends, I realize, he really does like me after all. For example: He brought over cake on Valentines Day and we made chicken schnitzel together. We still sleep all spoony and shit. He had dinner with my mom and brother this past Shabbat. Kissing details which I will not disclose here. He just now invited me over tomorrow to watch the Laker game and "Stay over."

That's huge to me because this exact conversation took place a few weeks ago at his house:
ME: I really like sleeping over with you.
***silence***
ME: Do YOU like when I sleep here?
HIM: Of course I do, why else would you be here?
MY INNER DIALOGUE: Because I keep inviting myself over and maybe you are too polite to send me home at midnight.


Maybe I need therapy. This insecure shit is getting old.

emotional nutcase

The best moment of all is in the early hours of the morning, as you both are starting to half wake up and fall back asleep, he turns over and pulls you close so he can wrap his arms around you, warm and safe.

boyfriend

I must confess that I had the most lovely evening and morning, spending time with the boy, watching the Grammys (he gave me full remote control privileges), giving foot rubs, listening to the rain patter on the skylight, sleeping and spooning, eating oatmeal in the morning, listening to Howard Stern and watching Arrested Development, not actually doing much of anything but being together and a lot of smiling. And kissing. Omigod, the kissing.

skanky texts (in lieu of writing report cards)

Hey, remember when we ate an entire lb of tomatoes in twenty minutes?

Gotta love that floordrobe!

Today my students all agreed that Chris Brown is NOT too young to be my boyfriend.

Happy obirthday

I think you have predict texting because you said you were eating a neck.

Schmuckhead is coming back in two weeks and I haven't found a boyfriend yet!

Yup, it's a floater.

I'm having this weird nostalgia for my life in Ireland, though I've never been.

Too much masturbating will make you sick to your stomach!

I, too, might be late. How great our joy.

Thanks for coming! Hope you liked it. We can talk jesus specifics on Monday.

Why yes, I'd LOVE a billy joel burnt CD, THANKS!

Today someone spilled a whole glass of water on the classroom carpet and i though i could smell your apt.

Merpy Honicmas!

We are fine, FYI, driving along in arizona. Only encountered one problem when neither of us knew how to get out of LA.

Eating eggnog in honor of xmas! Oklahoma rocks!

Nice timing on the text. I had an erection while my nephew was getting chopped.

I just bought the best deodorant you need to try it. It smells like fresh love. And all your hopes and dreams coming true.

less casino = more naked time

canada malaga rimini brindisi. NAGASAKI!

Teeth and old lady got a second rose. Brazilian dancer is out.

I forgot to put on deodorant. This doesn't seem to be the place to whip it out and apply.

That wasn't a dream. I can't resist a man in huge ugly clothes.

I love bears.

I just bought 100 books. Then the cashier asked me out.

hallmark

Today I ran a mile straight. As in, no stopping. As in, my goal.

Props to me.

Now I can begin on my second goal, which is to run two miles without stopping. It doesn't sound very imaginative, but I feel over the moon. Also, I get to buy new shorts.

***

On Saturday night, I attended my friend's engagement party for all of ten minutes. I said hello, stepped into the living room, and spied the Boy's ex. I exited into the backyard and immediately burst into tears. I called my mom and she gave me permission to leave. Then I called Haley to make me laugh. She reported that Luke, aged two, was repeating my name from his crib. I drove straight to her house.

***

Yesterday, I burned a whole lot of music off of Schmo's computer. I've been listening to Phish's Billy Breathes CD. I'm loving it. I also ripped a whole lot of Tribe Called Quest, which belongs on my orange, fruity ipod.

***

Saturday morning was the official ribbon cutting for my school. One of the mom's told me that her daughter talks about me at home all the time. It's Ms. Deens this, Ms. Deens that. Every day. Mom was wondering if she had any other teachers. It made me feel good, like I deserved it.

***

This afternoon, I hung out in the dollar book store picking up anything with a silver medal on the cover. I ended up with over a hundred books for my class. Two shopping bags and a box. After helping me out to my car, the cashier asked me out to dinner. I declined graciously, admitting that I was taken.

***

I might be falling in love.