Operation Conterfeit Money

Today we wake up late. We don't have much to do, so why hurry? Actually, we don't have anything to do. In bed I think about how there is nothing left here that I haven't done, nothing to do one last time. I'm seriously done.

We take steaming hot showers and pack up our room. We deposit our bags at the front desk and buy several churros apiece across the street for breakfast. MMMM. GREASE.

Here's the thing about the counterfeit money: Apparently, I have some. Two days ago, I reached into my money belt for my next hundred bill, and it ripped on its way out. It is important that I was taking the bill out of my money belt. I only keep a hundred Soles in my wallet at any given time, and when that is close to running out, I take out a big bill from the belt and use that. When I last went to the ATM, all the hundreds I got I put directly into my money belt. When I pulled out the ripped bill, whoever I was paying got a shocked look on their face and refused to take it, as if it were cursed. So it stayed in my wallet until now, when we had a chance to go to the bank and switch it. (Two days ago, when it ripped, it was Sunday and the banks were closed. Yesterday the banks weren't open before our flight to Lima, and we just didn't get around to going until today.)

So the first bank we try says that this bill is counterfeit. They show us the blue-light mark, the glittery dots, the invisible stripe -- all security measures that are LACKING in my bill. OK, but what do I do now? Well they say I have to go to the bank where I took out the money. Luckily, I have all my ATM receipts on me, so we push on to BCP. Where there is a huge line. Which we cut.

BCP tells me that there is no way that this bill came from a BCP ATM. They describe their security measures, that each ATM dribbles some invisible ink on their bills so that any bill in the country can be traced to a certain bank. We ask if it is POSSIBLE that whoever filled the ATMs was a "bad man" (we really use that term) and maybe put in counterfeit money. BCP says it is possible, but that no, it didn't happen. They think what happened is that I gave out my hundee to someone, asking for change, and the person took it, walked behind the counter, traded it with a fake hundred, and returned, saying they didn't have change. I argue that I got the money directly from the ATM and put it in my money belt, where it ripped.

Their final word is that if we want to make a claim, we have to talk face-to-face with the "boss" from the ATM BCP in Cuzco, where I got the money. But we are in Lima, we say, we are getting on a flight to USA tonight. We can't go back to Cuzco. This gets us nowhere. We plead with BCP to call the branch in Cuzco and report the counterfeit, maybe even ask if there have been any counterfeit complaints lately, JUST TO MAKE SURE. JUST TO CHECK. PLEASE.

Absolutely no can do. Apparently the two branches of the same bank cannot communicate with each other. There is no way the Lima BCP can make a phone call to the Cuzco BCP to see what's up. I cannot understand this logic, but I also cannot sit and argue all day long. I will have to make a complaint through WashMu (Best Bank Ever) when I get home.