changes

I've gone through some pretty huge life changes in the past few weeks. Now I'm on the other side and ready to write again.

The smallest of the changes was that I didn't have a computer for a month and a half. That shouldn't be a big deal, but it was. I stopped emailing people, stopped checking my websites obsessively, stopped procrastinating by "researching" on Wikipedia. I started reading again and forced myself to social plan the shit out of my weeks. Since June, I've hung out with every single friend and relative I have in town. I've read five books and went to the movie theater a few times. I painted my TV armoire which I've been meaning to do since 2007.

The biggest change was my job. I am helping to open a brand new middle school in LA. This is huge. I'm completely happy to be out of South LA and oppressive LAUSD. I am ecstatic that I finished the joke that is BTSA and now have a Clear Credential. I love my new coworkers. So far it has felt like a dream job. For example, we take a Red Mango break every afternoon and walk across the street to get frozen yogurt together. For another example, the school is providing us with black MacBooks. For the last example, I get to teach ancient history. Pyramids and shit.

The last change is that I let go of the emotionally unavailable fuck buddy I've been involved with for the past year. I always knew this was something that wasn't going to last, but I didn't want to give it up. Plus, it was super fun and made me feel like a better person (as convoluted as that sounds). As soon as my new job started, I realized that it was the ideal time to make a clean break. He took it very well and we were able to have a nice goodbye (with hot sex to boot). No hard feelings on either side and I'm welcome to call or not call him as I please. There is obviously no question that this was the right thing to do.

I haven't missed writing on this website because I've been trying to live outside my head. But I really miss the processing aspect of it. Once I get it down here perfect, I don't have to obsess or talk things out to seven different people. It's almost like therapy, but I would say it's closer to REM sleep. I've been meaning to make sense of everything again and so it's good to be back.