shit storm

I've been having a crap day at work. I suppose you could say that the whole month has been crap, and if I really think about it, I can be convinced that the crap started back in September. I'm talking about the supposed teamwork and respect that my co-teachers (don't) possess.

I could write a really long list of all the bizarre accusations against me this year, but that would just make me sad and put me to bed with red-rimmed eyes for the second night in a row. I'll just replay the latest incident. By now, I've spoken with my mom and three level-headed friends who have all assured me that I did nothing wrong yesterday or today, but the contempt is so thick in the air that it's hard to think rationally.

Yesterday afternoon, I sent this email. Keep in mind that I teach all afternoon in the cafe, which is where the cubbies are located, which is where the kids automatically come to hang out and play touch tag the minute they are dismissed from class.

Likewise, please, if you are going to let out your elective early or let the whole class get a drink, please go with them to the hallway/cafe. Today about half the school ran into the cafe yelling and screaming, and it was before 2:50 and disrupted the elective in the cafe, which meant I couldn't dismiss them orderly either. (Most of them don't even need to go to the cafe at this time; they just go because they have extra transition time.)

thanks

I was very conscious to keep my tone civil, to be polite (please/thanks), and to not name names. I sent this email to the three teachers and principal. Everyone I've showed this to has assured me that there is absolutely nothing wrong with it.

This is the response I got:

Lighten up. Can you just say things without being sooo passive aggressive. It's so annoying.

First of all, I am speechless. I cannot imagine sending such a rude and unprofessional email to a colleague. Second of all, there was nothing passive aggressive about my email. I stated the problem clearly and said exactly what I wanted. Third, in no way does this reply address the actual problem of students wandering the hallways unsupervised. Lastly, this teacher sent the email to Reply-All. For this I was grateful because I was hoping that the other teachers would be as appalled as I and help sort out the damage.

How wrong I was.

I approached the teacher this morning and restated my email reply that I didn't understand why he was so angry. Instead of apologizing / taking blame / addressing the problem / proposing a solution, he:

1. Argued that I should have mentioned the issue while standing next to him in line for carpool that afternoon. I replied that I'd written the email an hour before and assumed he'd already read it. [Does not address student supervision.]
   
2. Argued that I should have complained to him face to face. I replied that the last time I tried that, he got mad at me and walked away without hearing me out. [Does not address student supervision.]
3. Argued that I shouldn't have included the principal in my email. Actually used the phrase, "Crying to Daddy." I replied that my intention was not to get anyone in trouble, and did not name names for this reason. [Does not address student supervision.] At this point I reiterated the original problem, that of unsupervised and disruptive kids in the hallways.
4. Argued that he let his kids out at exactly the right time. Here, another teacher walks in and joins the conversation unbidden. I thought this was really rude. She chimes in that she, too, let the kids out at exactly the right time. I repeat several times that there were, in fact, MANY students clamoring to enter the cafe at least five minutes before class time had ended. I repeat several times that they were very disruptive. I repeat several times that they were unsupervised. I repeat several times that if one is to dismiss a class early or invite them all to get a drink, one needs to supervise them in the hallway or at the drinking fountain. They continue to insist that they were not at fault. We repeat this back-and-forth, the two of them maintaining their absolute innocence as an excuse for their non-response. [Does not address student supervision.]
5. Annoyed with their complete lack of taking responsibility, I spelled it out for them. "You are not listening to me. Can you agree that if you let your class out early, you will supervise them in the hallway? And if you let your class go to the drinking fountain, you will go with them? Can we do that?"
6. Pause.
   They stare at me like I'm throwing out a new idea.
   "Yeah, we can do that," they agree.
   

I'm planning to have a meeting with the principal about this type of behavior at our school. These besides-the-point arguments happen nearly every time I suggest a change or request improved logistical planning. I feel like I am constantly targeted for "saying things wrong," "undermining the team," "caring about every single little thing." None of these attacks ever addressed the actual PROBLEMS, like, NO ONE IS OUTSIDE ON CARPOOL, SHOULDN'T WE RECTIFY THAT? (Yes, a fellow teacher actually got mad at me because I suggested we work out a carpool rotation to ensure coverage. Her "rationale" was that we should just be able to work it out on our own instead of bringing the principal into mix, how dare I undermine the team by asking the principal to make decisions. As if the cie la vie program was working because NO ONE IS OUTSIDE ON CARPOOL.)

I have worked in many school environments and none of them were as toxic as this. At the Jew School, any teacher was liable to make complaints or suggestions in the staff meeting (without naming names, of course), and others would suggest a solution. The guilty stayed silent or took blame and apologized, like adults. No one proclaimed their innocence or attacked the complainer for daring to voice their opinion. The principal was present through this and tried to be supportive of both sides. After the meeting, the targeted behavior was changed, and no one thought of it again.

At the South LA school, we didn't interact much with the principal, but you can be sure that if someone had a problem with another teacher or a grade level, they let it be known. The offender would either say "Oops" or "Sorry" or "You're right" or "I don't remember that, but I'll keep it in mind next time" or "Wait, are you sure? Let's look at that again." Like, oh, LET'S SOLVE THE PROBLEM. I was never made to feel like my concerns were invalid or unfounded.

Good Tova, upon hearing my tale of woe, remarked that it sounded like my colleagues' idea of "teamwork" is to help hide each others' flaws and indiscretions from the boss. She's right; they seem to operate under the assumption that the principal should never know we mess up. That is not what I believe "teamwork" to be, and if this is truly the case, I don't want to be part of that team.